Know who you are by meaning your “No” and your “Yes”

Know who you are

 

There is an adverse effect that we as humans suffer from based on traumatic and non-traumatic experiences that we “grow” through. Sometimes these things challenge are ability to stand firm and Know Who We Are! We lose our self, find our self and for many of us, we have never truly experience who we are as a person.

We have the capacity to love others, show compassion expand far as the eye can see, but what is directly in front of the mirror, only goes so far. The lack of love and the lack of knowing our strengths, our weakness, what we enjoy, what we don’t enjoy, what we will put up with, what we will not put with, and the list goes on can hinder us from truly knowing who we are as a person.

When you lack defining your values for what you stand for and not stand for will prevent you from growing and if nothing else you should always stand for yourself. I am a big pushover, and have a problem with agreeing to a yes when my yes was actually a no. I deal with the memories of and guilt of knowing that I have needed a favor or 2, or 3, or 4 or 5 and have also been a favor for others but somehow I have fallen into the trap of agreeing to do things based on my need to one day ask a favor, or that the person is a family member or close friend.

With my children I have often been more forgiving or tend to not let go of those that I probably should just base on the relationship we have. It’s not always easy and it doesn’t always feel good to say no. What I have learned from Iyanla Vanzant is that you have to stand firm in who you are and that your no should be no and your yes should mean yes and you should feel good about both.

I have also learned that a good method to use is practice saying your no or if you don’t want to say no immediately, come up with your go to response that allows you the time to think through if you want to do this favor or not.

For example: let me get back to you on that I am not sure what I have going on right now or how soon do you need to know by.

Another good idea is to practice a method for urgent responses:  That’s such a short notice let me get back to you.

Hopefully these help,

I am still a work in progress and I am getting better but part of defining who you are is knowing what you are willing and not willing to compromise on.

 

Ri Wyatt

The Daily Column

Mundane is Mundane does?

Mundane is as Mundane does?

Have you ever felt like your life is obsolete? That nothing important ever really happens, or everything tragic seems to happen at once or is it simply the same ole same ole? Well I got news for you and hopefully you consider it great news. Its time to get on a path of rediscovery. The odds are, is that you have time within your day to start making some adjustments and if you feel like you don’t than that means it is time for you to re-adjust your lens.

If your schedule looks like this: Wake Up, Shower, Eat, Get the kids ready, get myself ready, drive, work, work drags, leave work, drive, play taxi cab, run errands, get home, eat, get a shower, go to sleep. Next morning… it starts all over again. It is time for you to …WAKE UP! You are not living!

There is time for enjoyment, there is time for yourself, and there is time to have some fun! Life isn’t meant to be a bowl of wheat bran dried up corn flakes, it is supposed to be about engagement. Even if you truly feel like there is no room in your schedule to change your routine, find enjoyment in those mundane moments.

Get goofy with the kids, put them to bed early and take you a relaxing bath, or have some cuddle time with your significant other. Make a dish you normally wouldn’t cook and turn on some music. Instead of going to the grocery store for the 3^rd time this week, cook what’s in the fridge and use that extra time to build on some of your business ideas.

You can’t just keep going on like a robot, day in and day out doing the same ole boring thing. Life is passing you by. Its time to grab on to the ropes of life and start swinging. Even if you start out slow, eventually, if you keep pumping at it, you will progress. Your happiness will increase and life will soon start feeling more enjoyable.

You don’t have to be a planner but if you find yourself stuck, use your cell phone calendar to start planning out some fun things you can do to break the habits of living the mundane life. Life happens, hurts happen, struggles happen but how you deal with it, process all those things and live in the moment is completely up to you.

 

Ri Wyatt

The Daily Column

Take Time to Connect

There is something magical about nature. When you take a walk around Gods precious land and just glide past the trees and the sounds of the birds chirping, there is a sense of peace that overcomes you. You have the ability to think clearly and peacefully. It’s relaxing and so soothing. But why is that?

When I think of Mother Nature, I think of a bond, a connection that is more than just the meet and greet of an eye. It is unseen and the blessing is that no matter who you are or no matter where you are from we all connect with Mother Nature in the same way. We are bonded some kind of way which is unseen but with a deepness in our soul. Each connection is difference but yet each connection is so precious.

As you get older you become to have more and more of an appreciation for the sounds, the greenery, the colorful trees, the sun, the sky, the birds , the grass, the sticks, the flowers, the water, the dirt, the leaves. Sometimes I sit in peace alone, breathing in the fresh air, sipping on a small cup of coffee, hoping the mosquitoes aren’t out to play.

I remember as a young child, when we lived up north, I could lay on the grass in a certain season and not be disturbed by a single ant. I would glare at the sky and talk about the shapes of the clouds and feel such an overwhelming amount of peace. When we moved to Florida, the beach became that place for me and the front porch of my home. I try to remember to sit on the front porch at least weekly and sip my tea or coffee so that I can really take in that moment to connect with the earth and soothe my soul for just a moment.

Life can be so hectic sometime, and Lord knows I feel that each of us are busier than ever, including our youth, but its important to take time to connect with the soothing force of nature. Feel up your spirit, enjoy a relaxing moment, hear the sounds and simply just breathe.

If you love nature as much as I do, how do you take time to disconnect from the world and connect with the love and embrace of nature?

 

Ri Wyatt

The Daily Column